you're a mystery yourself
i seriously need to have time to chill out. just do things for the sake of putting a smile on my face. i've been so busy with attachment and work and such. that i just dont have time to just relax. i'm always busy, always on my feet, so rarely at home that i feel so exhausted most of the time.
i just feel like going to the beach, in my stripey bikini eventho the tummy still there, with people that i love. Sitting on the beach towel and rubbing my feet on the sand. Wearing the big shades and trying to read even tho the sun super glaring. Feel the cool wind blowing thru my hair and the warm seawater surrounding my body. Rolling my eyes at remy singing sentimental songs while nad trying to pick off seaweed from her hair. And just hugging dee beside me. Dont forget the fags, food and coke people.
hell, i wish it would come true soon. i oh so need it.
&the beauty.
i dont care
i just wanna be yours
i know i told you
i'd never love you the way that i did again
after all that you did to me
i dont care
i just wanna be yours
and i am trying everything in my power
to never ever say
please come back to me
promise me
you'd always be
you'd never let go
you took the ring and everything
that comes with being my man
&the beauty.
it was a crazy unbelievable weekend.
nights of partying. drunkard behaviour. drama. funny moments. with totally different sets of people. i'm so spreading my horizon of friends. hah.
lets do it again.
definitely.
p/s: B, love spending the night with you. pack your bags please. we are so moving out. =]
&the beauty.
this week's attachment has been some sort of a crazy affair. what with all the cabuting work, MCs, the rushed work, the late comings, the late night dates, dee going away, not to mention the eventful soccer match.
oh yes people, you read it right. Soccer match. the big Futsal thingy among the wards in cgh. well, the story goes like this. our ward needed people to represent them in the futsal tournament and they turned to us for help. I was about to say my most favourite word 'No', when my beloved bestest best fren said the two of us would be more than happy to do it. Of course she didnt say in that polite way. She was more like, "eh, boleh arh." then i started to get used to the idea of me playing soccer , and so i opened my big mouth to say that i was in my school's soccer team. which is definitely a lie since i'm only the personal assistant of my gf who is the one in the soccer team. and they were so impressed by that until half an hour later, i proved to them that i couldn't kick decently. So i ended up being the goalie. haha. at least i get to wear the gloves even though it was only for 7 mins. the futsal was a big hoot. with nad screaming whenever she come into contact with the ball, with yan yan doing a flying kick yet misses the ball, with me catching the ball with my quivering thigh. in other words, we are so not athletic. i've told you nad, we should go gym often.
imissher.imissher.imissher.imissher.
maybe if i chant harder, she would be here right now.
&the beauty.
while searching for some lost testimonials, i came upon my diary of 7 years ago. haha. i know what you guys thinking, "like so kentalan"" rite? and i made a mistake by showing it to dee and nad, and they in turn burst out laughing. they wanted to read it so much so i let dem. its another huge mistake of course. and now they know my deepest secrets, my feelings and how i was so farking slenge. and yup, laughed at me again.
haha. and now dee gonna show me her love letters.
&the beauty.
its the big gulp. that saved us.
every single day of attachment, we had to have big gulp full of coke and little ice please. We will then put the big gulp in the fridge in the staffroom. and after that, all we could think about while we working, is the freaking big gulp itself.
so here it is, a tribute to big gulp for being oh so gassy and plain amazing.
&the beauty.
what a week.
super early mornings. extreme late nights.
lack of sleep. lack of food. lack of oxygen.
hard work. slacking at her place. tiredness.
fights. shits. tears.
like i said, oh what a week.
&the beauty.
you took my hand
you showed me how
you promised you be around
thats right
i took your words
and i believed in everything
you said to me
thats right
if someone said three years from now,
you be long gone
i stand up and punch them out
they'll be all wrong
i know better cause you said forever
and ever
who knew.
&the beauty.
Love is blind. That is one goddamn truth. Even after all those shits, even after all the pain, even after all the lies, i still love you. I wonder how you could do this to me. Didnt i give you my everything? everything that i had. yet it still wasnt enough. truth hurts. that's for sure. And i dont know whether i prefer to be kept in the dark and being lied to or to know the truth and feel the pain which is farkin killing me.
Where were your promises? Where were your reassurances? Why did you do this? Why didnt i see the signs? Why did i believe you? Why must this happen? Could i have stopped it? Could i make it work? Was it my fault? Did i do something wrong? And all those questions keep swarming in my head.
Where's your heart?
&the beauty.
oh fark. two days of rotting at home. with absolutely nothing to do except for sleeping, reading and eating. I swear to you my brain has gone all fuzzy due to reading all day. Things at home have improve just a slightest bit. Can you believe it, its only the month of May and my mom had bought the cloth for our hari raya clothes. My mom was even lamenting how my cloth looks so much nicer than hers. And i have to admit, it is damn gorgeous, something like shimmery golden.
On another hand, my hols are ending this week. Which means that I have to paarrtaay like fark this coming weekend, before i start going back to slacking at the ward with nad and the other slackers.
hmm. nad, maybe we can have our pretentious walk of being sisters again? this time around, lets ask afiq along.
&the beauty.
